Caroline's Birthday......

Yesterday was my sister-in-law Caroline's birthday.  My family has always done big Sunday dinners.  In recent years I was the one that did most Sundays because I love to cook and everyone would come to my house.  Sometimes now I don't even cook for myself on Sunday.  We always make sure if someone has had a birthday during the week that we do a birthday dinner on the Sunday closest to their birthday.  Sometimes we go up to New Hampshire and Caroline cooks which is great.... the girl can cook.  Today I cooked for her.  

Yesterday I cleaned the remaining rosemary off the plant and made rosemary and thyme bread.

 The pellet stove works great for the rising dough.

Chicken breasts stuffed with taleggio cheese and a few fresh tarragon leaves 

wrapped in prosciutto pan seared and then baked in the oven to finish. 

 Cannellini beans with butter, garlic and herbs.

(One of my brother wanted to know how I got them to taste so good....butter)

 Tomato, celery, cucumber, parsley, basil with lemon zest dressing. 

 rosemary thyme Bread

Happy Birthday Caroline

Jim and Caroline

 

Zachary (product of Jim and Caroline)

 

 He had to eat the apple sitting on the apple chair.....

So today was another landmark day for me.  Today was the first time since March that I have hosted a big family dinner.  It was nice to have all my sibling here.  Al is here for another day and then back to California.  It doesn't happen often that we are all together and it's nice for my mom to have all her babies in the same room.  I thought it would be hard for me because for the past 19 years Joe was here, but I was fine.  I'm good with it all.  I'm in a good place and I'm happy, truly happy.  I hope he is too.  Life goes on....Jenna said to me once years ago "someday you'll be gone and 100 years from now no one will know you were even here" I don't know about that ... I plan to leave a mark on this earth. Maybe I already have. 

My Brother Al......

Well it's official ... I am a gigantic phony ... just a big old liar ... according to my brother Al.  Al is my older brother.  The oldest of my siblings ... the birth right.  I feared him when I was a child and I absolutely love him as an adult.  He is one of the smartest people I know and whenever anything goes wrong in my life he is one of the first people I go to for advice.  He is incredibly funny, one of the only people who actually makes my sides hurt from laughing.  Al had nicknames for us as children ... my youngest brother Carl escaped without a nickname because he was the baby and seven years younger that Jim. Lisa was "Puge Poge Page" she was chubby and he thought it appropriate for her ... Jim was "Honey Babe" cause he was a bit of a whimp at times ... and me I was "Pus" according to him the most vile substance on earth.  There was this one incident where my mom saw him with a beer and he threw it in the woods and claimed she had seen wrong. I searched the woods till I found the 1/2 still cold bottle and handed it to her in front of him.  So yes "Pus" it was.

Al lives in California with his wife and kids and we don't get to see each other very often.  I picked him up at the airport tonight.  He flew into Manchester NH instead of Logan in Boston.  It was dark by the time he arrived and I had to drive back down Rt 93 in the dark at rush hour and I don't like to drive on the highway in the daylight so I was not happy.  I had planned on asking him to drive but then when he talked about how tired he was I didn't.  So I was driving and he was in the front seat and mom in the back.  The two of them then start with the politics and the state of the world and the economy.... and of course those little pills the Dr. gave me were not in my purse.   I was gripping the steering wheel and really white knuckling it when I asked if he could please open his window... and then he asked why? ..... "I just need a little fresh air" .... why?  "I just get a little nervous driving on the highway at night and I don't want to take my hands off the steering wheel and" ....that was it ..... "Your only going 50.....Ohhhhhh well if it isn't little Miss I'm Not Afraid Of Anything Anymore" ..... all this crap about how fearless you are on you blog is bullshit!  Yup... my brother reads my blog and he likes it...which amazes me...but apparently I've been outed.  The fact that I wasn't wearing my brace on my ankle or the fact that I don't wake up screaming anymore is not good enough... so I admit it "I am afraid of driving on the highway .... don't like it one bit ...but I did it and I didn't pull off the road and go screaming into the woods like I wanted to.  Got us safely back to moms without a problem, which I am now looking at as a learning experience.  I drove on the highway at night and I am fine...just need to keep doing it and I will overcome this too.    

Lisa...Al holding Jim and me .... before Carl

with Carl

I love my siblings more than anything....well, there is chocolate.......

living alone.....

Some days are just harder than others.  Sometimes the solitude just eats at me.  Other days I revel in it.  Today it's eating at me.  This is the first time in my life that I have lived alone.  For the past 8 months (except for the week that Jenna was with me) I have spent every night in my house alone.  Some nights I play music loud and sing and dance...I march around banging pots and pans together...because I can.  (I always had to keep the house quite before or I got hell for it.)  I have always lived with other human beings...even if no words were spoken there is comfort in knowing there is someone else breathing in my space.  The house I grew up in I was never alone there was always someone home my parents, my sister and 3 brothers.  I moved from that house to the apartment in Italy with husband #1.....then to the apartment back here with him and then back to my parents after the divorce.  Then I was there until husband #2....and now it's just me.  I suppose I should be ashamed that I am 48 years old and have never lived on my own.  Just the way it happened.  I remember a teacher in high school telling the class one day that for as high as you go you will go that low.  That you cannot enjoy the good unless you experience the bad.  It's true of everything in life.  So today I was lonely and I didn't enjoy it. 

Funny...as I write this a friend just sent me a text message and I am reminded that I am never really alone.  Lonely is a strange feeling...it comes and goes just like that.  Some days are just easier.     

Yesterday was easier..New Hampshire had to postpone trick or treat because of the snow.  So mom and Lisa and I drove up to see Zachary in his costume.  

I told him he was the cutest dinosaur I had ever seen...and he looked at me with complete frustration and said "I am a Triceratops, Aunt Sharon."  He's not even 4 yet.

Beast update....

For those of you following the saga of the Beast that lurks in my backyard ... this post is for you (and I believe there are 3 of you).   Today I slayed the Beast ... and he didn't go down without a fight.  I have never in my life seen so many staples and tacks ... that bastard was built to last.  I have pages of notes and a million photos but I know when I rebuild this monster next spring I'm going to have problems.  I have always loved a challenge but this is ridiculous. 

So there he is completely striped naked ... all that is left is wood, cardboard, springs and burlap.  I will have to remove and replace the cardboard and burlap, re-string the springs and fix some damage to the frame itself.  I'm thinking white fabric to match the other chair in the living room.  I cannot wait to sit on him and claim my victory......

Art....

My sister Lisa and I went to an art exhibit last night.  Walter the artist is a friend of Lisa's.  Lisa takes me to all of Walters shows so I can explain the art to her.  The pieces I cannot explain Walter does.  The guy is an absolute genius in my opinion.  Some of his stuff can be political and I'm not sure Walter and I see eye to eye on the politics but I try and respect the fact that we don't have to in this country and that's what makes our country so great. 

This piece is entitled "2 Party System" 

This piece is large maybe 5 ft by 4 ft. The red and blue are like giant party blow horns.  Some of them just butt up against each other and others cross over each other.  I asked Walter if the stars were missing from the flag because there are no stars in politics and he just nodded his head yes and smiled.  I love it when I get his stuff. 

LIFELIKE

The L is made with fake grass, the I with fake leather, FK is fake fur and the E is fake wood.  Lisa said "explain this,"  "really...there all synthetic materials made to look life like"......"Ohhhh."  I love the fact that my sister is brilliant (and I am not) and she needs me to explain this stuff to her.  

Skin Deep (BEAUTY)

A Star In Waiting for Its Gleam

Room for Discussion

 

DOWN side UP

See What I Say

Just Your Luck (antique prosthetic leg)

Waistband for a Glutton for Punishment (Faith)

The Fruits of My Labor - (Perhaps a Joke is in Order)

Okay... so I don't get all of Walters work .... some of it you really have to study for a while to understand....and some I never do .... but don't tell Lisa.