I haven't been hitting it out of the ballpark in the kitchen these days ... truth is I haven't really been trying on a daily basis like I use to. That used to be a huge part of my identity ... cooking was what I enjoyed the most. I liked making people happy with food. These days I am busy trying to figure out who the hell I am and what makes me happy. I have the freedom to explore so many avenues that cooking takes a back burner ... no pun intended. A friend recently told me about a veal dish that was so good ... and I realized I have never eaten veal or cooked it ... I shy away from it for the "ethical" reason. I decided I wanted to try it ... I know, I know ... but I break rules now. So yesterday Donna and I went grocery shopping together ... we've done this before and it's quite a lot of fun for me ... we start off together and then go our own way ... every once in a while we end up in the same isle and one of us will start "you know what else sucks" we have a mini conversation and then head off again. So there it was veal ... it looked harmless ... not intimidating ... I pushed the ethical thoughts out of my mind and bought it. I researched on line several recipes and then came up with my own recipe.
First I started a mushroom risotto ... I had some porcini broth in the freezer and some portobellos on hand and butter lots of butter ...
I sauted the risotto in butter and minced shallots for a few minutes on medium heat and then began adding the
mushroom and chicken stock a cup at a time ... once the first cup is absorbed you add the next ... I believe for the two cups of rice I used almost seven cups of stock ... but always one cup at a time ... tasting until you get the desired consistency.
The veal was already thin but I pounded it even thinner ... crumbled some dried sage and added some ground pepper .... laid a piece of prosciutto and a slice of gruyere ... folded them up into little bundles and tied them...browned them in butter until just cooked and transferred to a serving vessel ... I then deglazed the pan with a cup of white wine and chicken stock and then reduced the broth with butter until a sauce was rendered.
I wilted multi color swiss chard with a little olive oil, garlic, lemon zest and lemon juice ...
The plate was not so attractive ... considering you eat with your eyes first ... but the taste was not bad and the melted gruyere inside and the sauce on top was very good ...
Today I started a loaf of "Black Bread" in the morning before I went to church ... I got the recipe off of the site 101 Cookbooks ... the recipe calls for among other things ... finely ground espresso beans, cocoa powder, grated carrots, and rye flour ... too interesting to not try. It had to rise for 2 hours on the pellet stove and then punch down and reshape and rise another hour a least ... It was a long process but I believe well worth it.
I also bought a pork tenderloin yesterday ... half went into the freezer ... the other half I cut into 1/2 inch slices and pounded flat ... dredged them in flour that I seasoned with some chipotle seasoning and cayenne pepper. Then I browned them in butter ... removed them from the pan and added a finely chopped shallot ... added a little flour to the remaining butter and deglazed the pan with some chicken stock ... added dijon mustard and some sour cream ... a dash more of the spices and salt and pepper. It wasn't bad ... and grilled asparagus is good served with anything ...
I still have days when only Ben and Jerry can pass my lips ... but I am getting much better about eating. Trying to be creative helps ... and having a variety of foods on hand so if I have a craving I have something to satisfy it, is also good. I still have days when I ask myself if I ate anything that day ... but not nearly as many as I had 4 months ago.
I am addicted to these pickled vegetables ... and these tomolives are suppose to go in a martini ... but I ate a whole jar for breakfast last week ... 60 calories in a whole jar ... pickles green grape tomatoes really doesn't cut it as a meal ... I eat what I can when I can and for right now I'm maintaining my weight I believe ... I have more I can lose ... I just need to do it in more healthy way ... I'm just happy I still have boobs ... those are usually the first thing to go on a woman ...
All I know is I would not have survived these past 11 months with out my lovers Ben & Jerry ... I just hope I can always love them ... what if the day comes when I must once again avoid them ... look away ... resist them ... someone kill me if that day comes ...
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