Funny this year ... 2011 ... strangest year I have lived through ... I have had roughly 48 years and I have never had one like this. I've had really bad ones and really good ones ... but nothing like 2011. I have never had my entire world change in one year ... I have changed ... my life ... my health ... everything. I honestly didn't think people could change ... I always believed that fundamentally people were who they were at the core ... you can change the color of your hair ... your dress size ... but inside you remain who you are. I am still Sharon ... I still have the same sense of humor ... I just use it more ... laugh more ... I see more ... I taste more ... and I feel now ... It's like I had one eye closed a year ago and today both are open and I can see twice as many colors as I could a year ago. So odd that what I thought was living was not ... that I chewed food and swallowed it but never really tasted it. I feel like George Bailey ... and it really is a wonderful life. Odder still is looking back at the blog a year ago today ... 12-31-10 ... and seeing what I had planned for the coming year ... and having no idea what was really coming ... I managed to do all that I had set out to do ... but none even remotely in the way I thought. The snow globe that was my life a year ago didn't just get shaken and set back down on the table ... it was hurled against a brick wall and smashed into a million pieces with water and fake snow flying in all directions ... and from the embers that remained of the fire something different grew ... something infinitely better ... my life. There were 5 things that I said I would do in the year 2011 ... #1 Acupuncture - I continued it every Wednesday ... I was being treated for my neck a year ago but April through June I was treated for grief ... and son of a bitch ... it really works. I don't know how those little needles do what they do but I am better for having it every Wednesday. #2 I promised to eat better and loose weight ... well I can say I am eating better ... when I can eat ... I've lost over 50 lbs and I feel I look better ... not the exact way I had planned to loose the weight ... I think once the divorce is final I'll be able to eat normally again ... but I will never gain the weight back. #3 Exercise - I said this was going to be the hard one for me ... turns out it is the easiest ... with my new life I needed extra income so I got the cleaning job ... vacuuming a football field and washing a floor the size of Fenway Park every week I have muscles in places I didn't think I had muscles. #4 going to be more present in my life ... HELLO ... say no more ... #5 Paint - this one I really didn't do a lot of ... I did paint the switch box and now that the holidays are over there is a large canvas on my easel with the under painting started ... that I am doing for my good friend Donna. It's of a path in the woods ... another new thing I love to do ... explore the woods near my home. This year I have made new friends ... and rediscovered old friends ... and realized the value of friends ... and how a true friend will let you cry when your sad and laugh with you when your happy. There are a few lessons I've learned this year ... one is to know the quality of someones character ... make sure you know who your dealing with ... make sure someone is genuine. The next is honesty ... I vowed this year that I will never be in a relationship with family, friends or a lover that is not based in honesty ... never again will I be with anyone in any capacity that says "I don't want to talk about it" ... and last but not least I am a good girl ... always have been and always will be ... but I break rules now!
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