Friends and stuff.........

I have said before that I am a materialistic person.  I like my pretty things...I can't help it...it's part of who I am.  My father had two mothers...his parents divorced when he was young and my grandfather then married Helen or as we called her MooMoo (Swedish for grandmother).  My father's biological mother was Mary and she was a hoot (we won't go into that).  Mary collected and traded Antiques and as a young girl I loved looking at all her pretty things.  Helen was beautiful and refined and had great taste.  My mother's mother had some beautiful pieces of china locked away in her china cabinet that she displayed but never used.  I now own along with my sister Lisa most of the things that all 3 grandmothers had.  

This china cabinet belonged to my mom's mother Bessie...

This chocolate pot and cups belonged to dad's mom Mary.....

 The rose lamps in my living room were a gift from my mom's dad James to Bessie... 

they were her prized possessions...

and the house I live in belonged to Helen and my grandfather... 

and then there is just pretty stuff that's mine like this bowl Lisa gave me one day just because...

 or this bobble I bought myself a few months back because I needed a present...

 the antique ink well...

 and I have more jewelry than any woman needs... 

All of this stuff is great...but that's just what it is stuff...and someday I'll be gone and this stuff will belong to someone else.  I like looking at it...it's pretty...but at the end of the day it doesn't talk to you or ask you how your day was.  I grew up in a big old Victorian house...I loved that house and when my mom sold it a few years back because it was just too big for her... my siblings and I mourned.  Every time I drove past that house I would cry.  The day Lisa's boyfriend Harvey died 5 years ago I stopped crying for the house.  It was just a place we lived not a human being.  

In the past several months I have had time to ponder lots of things.  One thing that is abundantly clear to me is the importance of family and friends and healthy relationships.  When we are getting ready to leave this life it's not going our china or lamps that we will be thinking of...it's going to be the people we love and who love us.  

I've made some new friends in the past 8 months...and I've really enjoyed it.  It surprises me how much you can have in common with people who were strangers to you such a short time ago.

I had lunch with an old friend today.  I've seen him here and there through the years and we say hey or just laugh at each other.  Just looking at this guy would bust me up remembering some of the crazy stuff we did as teenagers.  We met in a restaurant in town and talked for what seemed like hours.  It amazes me that we haven't had a real conversation in over 30 years but we just picked back up like we had talked just last week.  Some friends are like that.  It was very natural and easy.

Stuff is great and pretty to look at...but at the end of the day...it's family and friends that are at the heart of it...nothing is as important as human beings and relationships...all the money in the world can't buy love or happiness...and I would sell all my pretty things in a minute if a friend needed something...  

   

Custom made bra.....

My mother gave me the greatest gift... my sister Lisa.  She is my best friend.  My sister is good to me.  She always has been.  Good isn't an adequate word to describe how Lisa treats me...she goes above and beyond what most sisters and friends do for each other.  She is fiercely loyal to me and would do anything for me...and yet she says I am the wind beneath her wings.  She has literally carried me these last eight months.  She makes me laugh when I am crying and anyone who can do that has my love.  She is generous to a fault...my wallet doesn't come out of my purse very often.  Which brings us to last night...and the custom made bra fitting.  She recently won a gift certificate for a custom made bra a $100 value at the fund raising fashion show for Tailored For Success, Inc. http://tailoredforsuccess.org.  She was so excited and if she got one you know she had to get me one...so she bought me a gift certificate.  The name of the company is Zyrra.( and you can find more info at www.zyrra.com or contact anne@zyrra.com) The concept is genius...no two women are the same shape so how can we buy bras off the rack and have them fit properly.  I was a 40 DD a year ago...now I am according to the fitting last night a 38-39 D...but the measurements don't stop there.  They have this set of crazy looking bras...they range in size from puberty to Chesty Morgan... first the woman fits the under wire of these bras under your breast until she finds the perfect size. (I have never been able to wear an under wire bra because they hurt...not this one)  Then she takes these weird measurements like the distance between the nipples and she measured from where the breast tissue starts under the arm around and across the nipples to the other underarm.  Then she measured each breast individually starting under the arm across the nipple and into the cleavage...all women have different size breast, one is slightly bigger than the other...not me mine are exactly the same size she took the measurement a couple to times to make sure...I always have to be different.    

The fitting bras...

 puberty...

 Chesty Morgan...

Once the measurements were done I had to pick colors.  Now this was hard...I'm not gonna lie...I was struggling.

This is the pink base with black lace...this is Lisa not me...

So these were the choices a solid color with a lace over color

black, white, pink and cream...I gave it a lot of thought and went with what I thought was the most me   

and this is what my heart told me to go with 

cream over cream...I know I'm boring...

so in a couple of weeks I will be the proud owner of a custom made bra 

(and I got the matching panties)

 I'm thinking of hosting a party...if anyone is interested let me know!  

War Wounds...

I feel like I am at war...well in battle lets say...in many ways...and with many things.  Some are personal, private and no one knows but me.  Other things are right out there for the whole world to see...and then there is the beast that lurks in my back yard that only my neighbors can see.  This beast has bested me the past few days and I fear may drive me right out of my mind.   I have worked tirelessly since March to rebuild my fragile ego...I have fought negative feelings on a daily basis...and just when I started feeling like I had the world in my pocket ... like I can do anything and nothing can stop me...the beast rears it's ugly head and growls at me.  I will not give up without one hell of a fight and I will prove to myself once and for all that I can do anything...it may take a year...but I will slay the beast.  I will rebuild and reupholster the beast and then I will put him in my living room and sit on him!

The Beast...

 I have worked with lots of furniture in the past but nothing like this...

 There are techniques used here that I have never seen before...

 I don't know if this would be considered Art Deco or  Art Nouveau but it's something 

and it's going to be gorgeous when I'm done with it!

It's only been a few days but I have pages of notes and about 50 pictures as well as several drawings to help me put this monster back together.  It is in the backyard because it has some mold and mildew issues, but just with the fabric (which I have to keep to use as patterns for the rebuild)...I was afraid the wood would be bad but it's in great shape.  The frame itself is damaged on one side and someone tried to fix it but I'm going to have to remove most of it and rebuild it.  I have allergies to mold and mildew so my nose is not happy.  The minute we have one cool day my hands get all dry and my finger tips split (you could say I have dry skin issues) so working with my hands is not pleasant...the thick leather gloves help to protect me from the billions (and I'm not exaggerating) of tacks and staples.  My goal is to get it down to the wood and get it into the basement before it snows.  (Some ASS said it may snow Thursday...over my Seasonal Affected Disordered dead body it will.)  Another problem is the days are getting shorter...well it's getting dark earlier and I have so little time when I get home from work before it's dark out.  I will keep up the good fight and hope for a victory...for now the beast lay sleeping in my backyard...but someday....  

Braised Fennel with Pineapple Sage and Pineapple Juice

This is fennel and pineapple sage, fennel has a licorice taste and I don't like licorice, however I love fennel.  I know, I know.......I have braise fennel with other things before usually orange juice, but I didn't have orange I have pineapple and this is the last of the pineapple sage from the herb garden....so that's what I used .... this is now my favorite way to braise fennel.  

clean and remove the tops and bottoms and cut into chunks...

 melt butter in a skillet and add the fennel and salt and pepper....

 brown and add the pineapple sage...

 once it is nice and browned add pineapple juice and leave it alone....

 eventually all the juice will cook off (I added juice a second time and let it cook down even more)

 Yes I ate it all..... it took two days but I did it....

OMG ..... I am a girl .....

I have lived the last 48 years thinking I am not a real girl... I can't wear nail polish, I try but my nails just disintegrate....I hate shopping with a passion.  Love to grocery shop but clothes and shoes ... yuck!  I have know idea what happened to me and to be perfectly honest I am truly disappointed in myself.  I bought a pair of boots today... I can't wear boots I wear a brace on my ankle ... well not in the house anymore ... haven't in several months... which I have explained in prior post so I'm not going to explain again (go back and look for yourself)... anyhoo ... I put the boots on and the too tight pair of skinny jeans I bought the other day in a size I have not fit into in (the word decades comes to mind) a long time.  Then I (now disappointed in myself even more) proceeded to accessorize with the jewelry and handbag that matched the boots and furry vest (WTH) (who the hell am I.... and what did I do with me) .... then I stood in front of the floor to ceiling mirror and looked at myself  for what seemed and eternity.... I finally screamed O GOD ... WHO THE HELL ARE YOU .... and changed into my pj's .... this new me is kind of fun ... I still can't wear nail polish I have tried for the past several weeks.... I have no nails left at all....

    

Procrastination.....

I am a giant puddle of procrastination today...I will not let myself get anything done.  Oh I took the tarp off the antique sofa in the back yard to let the air at it so I could start to take it apart this afternoon... nope!  Around noon Erika called to check in ... I had just told myself to get upstairs and start sorting through all my clothes.... have to get rid of all the clothes that are too big now and put away summer and get out winter.... but did I tell her that's what I was going to do ... nope!  "Let go get lunch at O'Sullivan's" (voted Boston's best burger many years in a row).  

I never drink in the middle of the day... ever... because it makes you tired and I have stuff to do....

nope!

Add one beer and one O'Sullivan burger together and you become a human slug.....it is now 5:40 and I have not sorted one item of clothing.... 

The answer to the question "is that burger bigger than her head?" is yes!

I have not cleaned the pellet stove and it's freezing in the house... can't turn it on until I clean it.  My house needs to be cleaned.... and here I sit blogging.   OK.... I am now going to do everything on the list that I should have started this morning.....nope! 

Fear of Heights.....

OK...... I know I have spent a great deal of time recently patting myself on the back because I'm not afraid of anything anymore ....but the truth is I am still afraid of heights.  I think that any sane person is.  You can DIE if you fall even if the distance is not that great.  

I had a meeting tonight with my fellow Property Trustees at my church.  The group consists of the pastor (a woman) my sister Lisa, myself and the boys.  The 5 men are a great group of guys who just love to give me a hard time... especially about this sign that I finished (after 2 years) and is still not hanging outside.....

Tonight after the meeting Rene had a moisture detector and was going to check the level of moisture in the ceiling of the sanctuary.  He and Steve went up inside the organ chamber and climbed up.  Rick stayed below in the choir loft .... I was in the choir loft, but I don't like being even that high, so when Rick reminded me that I had my camera, I had my excuse to get back down to the ground level.

see Steve.... 

 see Steve crawl...

 see Rene pass Steve the pole with the moisture detector taped to it.....

 see Rene stand up and Sharon throw up....

 These picture don't do the height justice......

 but these do.....

 Rick .... making sure they do it right (because he is the Chairman of the Property Trustees)

 Rene wanted a turn......watching them was truly making me sick....

 This is the reason for the risk of life and limb....another spot of peeling paint....

So yes, there is moisture up there but it's not as bad as the wall on the stairway up to the choir loft or other spots that were tested tonight.  It is a constant battle to keep up with the leaks and other problems in this beautiful old building, but that's the job of the Property Trustees.  Unfortunately we have learned the hard lesson that for everything we repair, or pay big bucks to have repaired, something else fails or springs a leak.   But as the old saying goes God helps those that help themselves .... so we keep fighting the good fight and patching the old slate roof.